“I am always fine once I’m away, the problem is in between being here and getting there”. I honestly don’t know how often I have vocalized that sentence.
I now live in Hamburg but am originally from a town near Naples. I went back home for Christmas and the thing I was asked the most was “Are you happy to leave and go back to Germany?”. The tricky thing is that there is not a yes or no answer to this question. Yes, I am happy to leave because I like Hamburg. It is a nice city and even if it’s terribly cold, I unexpectedly like the snow. Plus, I met some incredible people who made the whole experience unforgettable.
Still, I miss the sea. I miss my friends, my mom and dad, and my little brother. I am among the privileged who have the chance to have incredible experiences, ticket in one hand and luggage in the other, with excitement mixed with nostalgia for when I will not be home anymore. I have the greatest fortune to travel to diverse destinations, but leaving your home and everything you have always been familiar with is never truly simple. I feel my heart soften when I hug my grandparents goodbye. It’s always hard to see my mom cry at the airport, even if she has already done it dozens of times. She will still be the one to stay awake all night for my plane to land at 8 am and text “Gioggi tutto bene? Sei arrivata??” (Are you ok? Did you get home??). I admit, I cried a little immediately after that.
When I arrived in Germany the first thing I did was get the keys to my room, empty my luggage and go into the kitchen. There I met my dorm mates who were kind enough to invite me to an Ikea trip that afternoon. I thank them to this day. I was about to have a meltdown between the kitchen appliances and had to keep it together since I only knew them for a few hours. After we went home and had dinner together, I went back to my room and cried watching “The Hand of God” by Paolo Sorrentino by simply seeing the Vesuvius. Even if the idea of having to move your stuff to another place makes your head hurt, once you’re there your heart will get lighter. Still, it does not happen right away. The process from getting there to being there is gradual and slow. It’s as easy as waking up every single morning, going to uni, meeting friends, studying, and then going back home. You get more used to how the bus lines work and dealing with whatever the hell they sell in supermarkets. I have been living in Germany for four months now but I cannot live without Google Translate when I do grocery shopping, absolutely impossible. You’ll get to hang out with new friends, cultivate new relationships and interact with different cultures from different countries.
A great idea my friends and I developed throughout our stay was to establish weekly Sunday “family” dinners. We cook together every week, sing, and listen to a friend play the piano. Now, every Sunday evening when my mom calls me the first thing she asks is “What did you guys have for lunch?” And we get to talk about our day and she can explain how to master my cooking skills. Even if you go away you are never fully alone. Whether it is through a phone call or visit, not a day has passed where I have not felt the unconditional support of my family and close friends. There will be occasions to be back home, to visit your loved ones and you will be happier than ever to tell them all about your life and to hear all that took place in theirs.
You can read and follow up on previous parts of my story of moving to Hamburg here.